Blank Canvas.

There are two ways in which something dies.

All at once. Or a bit every day.

The thing with something dying all at once is that it leaves an imprint on a part of you, in some way or shape or form, forever. It does this because it's there one day. And the next it isn't. And all that you felt for it, doesn't just disappear the day after it goes.
It stays bottled.
Stored. Stationary. Stagnant.

Your feelings don't have the outlet to leave. So what you felt, is somehow ironically preserved in its most wholesome form, within you. Time lessens its impact on you but doesn't deny its once so obvious existence. And so now and again you wake up and you can still remember what you felt. How you felt it when you felt it. The great feeling it gave you when you did. The respect you have for it despite it no longer existing or present in your life.

The death of something suddenly kills what you have but the residue of feelings remain. And if they don't leave something good behind, over time they don't leave something bad either. 

And then there are those things that die a little every day. Minute by minute. Hour by hour. A drop at a time. These things suck the life out of you. They slowly kill off every good memory one by one. As something dies inch by inch, so does something within you. Something in what you feel. In your vision of the other. Something that was once so beautiful. So wholesome. So untainted. Now begins to look ugly. Feel wrong.

And you can't quite trace when it happened. Because it happened so gradually. It happened in all those moments when it was dying a little every day. In that bitterness. That toxicity. The begrudging. And in that process your memories of it have also changed. You can't quite remember the good. The times where it was anything other than what it is now. And your grip on it lessens. Your fight to save it weakens. Your need to keep it alive wanes. There is now more bad in it than good. Way more bad. That's how you know you've let it go. 

And just like that you wake up one morning and you realise you feel nothing for it anymore. And trust me when I say this, it feels amazing, really amazing. I promise. 🌌